Yoga Archives - yogawithpragya

The Guru’s Light: Remembering Sharath Jois

November 18, 2024

vande gurūnām caranāravinde….

I got the news of Sharath’s passing early morning on a Tuesday. In this age of AI and fake news I thought it was fake news. But as the truth settled in, so did an unexpected and profound sense of loss. Even though I had only met Sharath in passing (during my brief brush with Ashtanga Yoga in Mysore), I feel strangely bereft, as though the loss was personal.

I’ve followed the Ashtanga lineage closely and have drawn inspiration from countless teachers within it. I have many friends who are devoted to the Ashtanga yoga practice. As practitioners we never think of teachers as human, bound by the same mortality that binds us all. The passing of legends is a vivid reminder of life’s impermanence. As history shifts and the ground beneath our feet starts to shake – I find myself asking how I want to step into the future.

Yoga is a practice where teachers and gurus play a central role. Sharath’s passing has forced many to contemplate on the figure of the guru. What is a guru? What does it mean to have a guru? Does the head of a lineage I follow become my guru? Can my guru be someone I’ve never met? Many of us are blessed to have beacons of light in our lives, but only truly value them when their presence becomes a memory. Others remain on an eternal quest, busy doubting the teacher, oblivious to the answers right before them.

Sharath Jois was a phenomenal teacher, one of the most powerful of the 21st century. He was an example – finding joy in life and yoga amidst the ups and downs. He touched countless lives, including those he had never met. I never learned asana from him, but I learned so much yoga.

But that’s the thing about yoga legends. Their purpose transcends asanas. The exist to connect you, unite you and bring you peace. And maybe that’s why with Sharath’s passing, I feel bereft of a teacher, even though I never studied with him….

Sharath Jois was more than a teacher; he was a beacon. His presence, his practice, and his joy in both yoga and life were transformative. He touched countless lives, including those he never met—mine among them. I never learned asana from him, but I learned so much yoga.

And that’s the thing about true yoga teachers. Their purpose transcends the postures. They exist to unite us, to help us find peace within ourselves and the world around us. That’s why, even though I never studied directly under Sharath, I feel the emptiness of his absence as if I had.

I revisited a conference recording from 2015. Listening to it again transports me back to those 15 transformative days in Mysore. It almost brings Sharath back to life again. But I guess Sharath doesn’t need to be brought back to life. He lives on in his students and in their yoga.

0 Comments

Asana Pregnancy/Parenting Notes Yoga

Conception to Postpartum in a Series of Weekend Yoga Workshops

July 16, 2024

I’ve taken this picture so many times at Bellur, and never thought one day I’d be posing with my daughter.

I spent the past weekend in yoga workshop with Murlidhar sir, a yoga teacher who played an instrumental role in my pregnancy journey, from conception to postpartum. This blog was supposed to be about taking a 3.5 month old to a yoga retreat. But as I wrote it, it became a game of connect the dots. It turned into a blog about how I attended a weekend yoga retreat in 2019 and met an impressive but little known yoga teacher who would one day have a profound impact on my life.

My journey has been nothing but magical or, as my gynaecologist would say, ‘a miracle’.

4 Comments

RIMYI Experiences Yoga Philosophy

The Ultimate Surrender – Intersection of Yoga & Vedanta

May 10, 2023

At the beautiful temples of Belur & Halebidu.

The philosophy of yoga and Vedanta sometimes intersect, and I love spotting this overlap in different classes.

During the last RIMYI class I took, Raya spoke about letting go. When we talk about letting go of something, there is an assumption that you’re holding on to something. It’s important to analyse this something. How are you holding on to it? Why are you holding on to it? Once we analyse it, can we let it go?

To make it relevant to the asana practice Raya asked us to ask ourselves what we were feeling in the asana we were holding (Uttanasana). What were we truly feeling? Were we feeling our hamstrings hurting, or was the back hurting, or were we holding the abdomen too tight? When you can identify what you are holding – you can begin to let it go. “I let go of my back, I let go of my abdomen, I let go of….” He asked us to do the same in Sirsasana, but focus on mental conditions/conditionings. He asked: Can letting go be voluntary? Can we actively let go?

He gave us the example of how he came across a ratty old t-shirt when he was cleaning his cupboard. Everyone tells you to let go of this old tee that you don’t even use anymore, but you can’t. We need to understand that it’s not the object that we can’t let go – it’s the memories associated with it that we’re unable to let go.

What are we actually holding on to? Can we analyse that similar to how we analysed Uttansana? Mentioning yoga sutra 1.11 he asked us to ponder over what is the role of memory and cleansing the memory. Can we actively identify and do something about? Letting go of an old t-shirt is easier than letting go of memories. Memories can be good, troublesome, traumatic, ecstatic. How do we deal with this baggage of memories and how does it impact us? Can we let go of attachment to the memory? Can we actively let go of sad memories? Going into parsva sirsasana he asked us to contemplate looking at the memory from a different angle.

अनुभूतविषयासंप्रमोषः स्मृतिः PYS 1.11

Memory is the unmodified recollection of words and experiences.

He spoke about two sutras that he would frequently speak to Guruji about:

सुखानुशयी रागः PYS 2.7

Pleasure leads to desire and emotional attachment.

दुःखानुशयी द्वेषः PYS 2.8

Unhappiness leads to hatred.

A person with a sense of discrimination should strive a balance between sukha and dukha instead of living a the mercy of these two. There are so many triggers in life today – we are all used to certain manners, ways and customs. But can we let go of getting triggered? Raya told us that us to actively open our drawers and pull things out and look at everything that comes out and ask ourselves if we are using it. Have we been keeping certain memories in the cupboard, maybe even in the freezer. And even in the freezer have they become rotten and started stinking? Can we actively bring these memories out, clean them up and throw them away?

How do we throw these memories away? By turning it from klista to aklista.

वृत्तयः पञ्चतय्यः क्लिष्टाक्लिष्टाः PYS 1.5

The movement of consciousness are fivefold. They may be cognizable or non-cognizable, painful (klista) or non-painful (aklista).

The fact that it happened remains, but the feeling associated with it goes. Raya also stressed that we all want happiness, but we remember the sad things more – happiness has a shorter shelf life. Happiness is like camphor or mercury – you can’t hold it, it evaporates.

Next in Sarvangasana, Raya asked us to finally consider what we can let of of intellectually. He spoke of fear and how we’re all fearful of something. But some are able to face their fear because they have practiced handling this fear. Practice analysing your fears and insecurities – once analysed can we let them go? After giving daanam in a temple, we pour water over our hands symbolically ‘washing away’ our attachment with what we’ve given. We need to let go of claiming things – ‘I’ did this, ‘I’ own this etc. The most difficult thing is to let go of this claim. After letting go of these claims, can I let go of the ‘I’ itself?

When one moves from the grossest to the subtlest, neither the beginning is seen nor the end.

My Vedanta teacher always stresses the importance of balance in life. It is important for us to seek pleasure, but also to accept that pleasure and pain come together. As seekers we are encouraged to go after our dreams and desires, but we need to remember that the result of our pursuit depends on many factors. Therefore, we can’t be swayed by victory or defeat, sukham or dukham. We should pursue life according to dharma, and with the best of our physical, emotional and intellectual intent. And surrender the results, fruits, fear and even happiness to a higher purpose.

What is left to surrender when I have surrendered everything?

My teacher explained the idea of surrender using verse 18.66 of the Bhagawad Gita.

सर्वधर्मान्परित्यज्य मामेकं शरणं व्रज |
अहं त्वां सर्वपापेभ्यो मोक्षयिष्यामि मा शुच: ||

In this shloka Lord Krishna is asking Arjuna for the ultimate surrender – the surrender of the ‘I’ or the ego. Letting go of the ‘I’ in all the claims that I make. Once I have surrendered everything, I surrender the ‘I’ too. And in that way I merge with the One, the universal consciousness.

At the Blue Temple, Chiang Rai.

0 Comments

Yoga

On Guru Purnima

July 13, 2022

To commemorate Guru Purnima, we had a special Vedanta lecture this morning, focused on the meaning and significance of the day for seekers. Subhadra ma’am started with defining the word guru: remover of the darkness of ignorance. Vedanta is the study of the Self, and the Guru is someone who reveals the glory and magnificence of our Self to us. On Guru Purnima we invoke the essence of the guru parampara. We appreciate and acknowledge the efforts of those who have walked this path before us and made it smooth and easy for us.

Subhadra ma’am then delved into the reasons why we study Vedanta. She explained that the study of Vedanta results in self transformation. Through our study, contemplation and understanding, we hope to remove the obstacles that stand between us and this transformation. These obstacles are both emotional and intellectual. She reminded us that as students we must remember that removing these obstacles is a gradual effort that requires constant sadhana and dedication. It is a time consuming process, and transformation doesn’t happen over night or even in the course of a few weeks. This process is also known as the atma katha – the story/journey of our innermost self.

With Shriram, learning kalaripayattu and Acro yoga.

Next ma’am spoke about the greatness of the Guru. The Guru is great is because he has been blessed by the shastras. A Guru’s greatness can be conditional but the shastra’s greatness is ever existent, unconditional; it is this unconditional greatness that is transferred from guru to shishya. The Guru can be likened to a celebrity promoting Brahma vidya/sukha vidya/atma vidya/ananda vidya. Which is why the teachings are always in the form of a dialogue – the seeker has questions and is given answers. In the Bhagawad Gita (the second Vedanta text we’re studying), Arjuna frequently repeats his questions, and the Lord answers him patiently. This is symbolic of how, as seekers, we might not understand an idea or a concept at the first go, but Vedanta is patient and will support our endeavours.

To commemorate Guru Purnima, we worship and pay homage to the entire guru parampara – the parampara commencing directly from Lord Narayana, Lord Dakshinamurthy and the Adigurus, so that we can learn from the shastras. We look at ourselves in the mirror of the scriptures and see the beauty that lies there. We salute the entire lineage we’ve become a part of.

Thankful to my dance guru, Honey Unnikrishnan, for teaching me more than just dance, and being there to answer all my questions with honesty, openness and humbleness.

The guru-shishya parampara pervades all Indian art forms, perhaps because art is a discovery and exploration of Self. My dance teacher, Honey Unnikrishnan took some time out today to discuss the guru shlokas we recite in the beginning of class. The Guru is someone who holds your hand (metaphorically) and leads you to the light, never letting go of your hand on this journey. So the Guru is God in disguise and we must appreciate that. Guru is equal to God, if not above Him. Both my Vedanta and Mohiniyattam teachers emphasised transformation and change and stressed the importance of saluting not only your direct guru but the entire parampara

As I listened to these talks by two of my gurus, I thought about my own transformation. About how this past weekend in Auroville, I easily prostrated myself in front of Ramesan Lakshman, the guru at Kalarigram. A decade ago I believed the practice of touching anyone’s feet was regressive, a tribute to chauvinism, a ritual that had no place in this century. But over the years I’ve searched for and found wisdom, guidance, support and (dare I say?) enlightenment from gurus of classical dance, literature, kalari and yoga. And when I bow down before a guru today, I do so with a comforting sense of surrender and trust in this age old pramapara.

To meet a student where they are is a characteristic of a good teacher. I’ve attend classes with numerous teachers and have been lucky to gain insight and inspiration from the best. @Kalarigram

3 Comments

Travels Yoga

Swimming With the Sharks (A Maldivian Honeymoon)

March 19, 2022

I learned how to swim pretty late in life (early 30s) thanks to a Mrs. Vardhan who was generous with her patience and with her time. I wanted to learn because it’s a wonderful workout, and therapeutic at that. Little did I know that one day I’d be swimming with sharks in the expanse of the great Indian Ocean.

All set to snorkel near our water villa. Sea life differs from area to area and we looked forward to seeing the variety of fish surrounding the island.

My first experience of snorkelling was years ago during a school trip to the Andamans. My memories of that experience aren’t particularly fun, so I wasn’t overjoyed about snorkelling in the Maldives (at the Sun Island Resort). But Animesh was super excited, and so off we went. It wasn’t until I got into the choppy waters with the snorkelling gear jammed tightly over my face did I recognise that the discomfort I was feeling was actually a sense of fear. I was out of my territory – I’ve spent years training myself to breathe deeply through my nose. Breathing through the snorkel with my mouth felt strange, unnatural and very very uncomfortable.

BKS Iyengar famously said, “Your nose is for breathing and your mouth is for eating. If you breathe through your mouth I will put food in your nose.” Under the water, with tiny (and not so tiny) fish flitting all around me, I strained to inhale and exhale through my mouth. And then it dawned on me that a truly flexible human isn’t one who is able to breathe rhythmically when on a yoga mat with the intention of doing so. True flexibility is being able to breathe in whatever way the situation demands. So, as I struggled to get comfortable in the depths of the Indian Ocean, I forced myself to calm down. I started to engage my lungs to breathe deeply and rhythmically through my mouth.

A lazy tree pose on deck. Happy to see the sharks and other fish up close.

Recently I lectured my students about the importance of cultivating a self-practice. When there is no self-practice, yoga is merely an activity confined to our mats and we remain limited to and by our physical boundaries. Our physical boundaries are a fraction of what we are as humans. The expanse of the human mind is more vast than the Indian Ocean, and just as interesting. When we practice by ourselves, devoid of the expectation of cues and the ‘experience’, we can begin (and hope) to tap into this space. In this space lies the ability to breathe better when needed, to calm down and detach, to relate to others more intelligently, to listen to the wisdom our inner voice and to marvel at the plethora of life in the universe,

Once I worked this out in my mind, swimming in the ocean seemed like an extension of my practice. I observed more, moved my arms and legs in different ways, swam in place or in circles, didn’t panic at the sight of sharks or a little water in my face mask, and most importantly, was able to explore more of the deep blue sea…

2 Comments

Yoga

The Nature of Inspiration

October 11, 2021

In Colombo, Sri Lanka, eons ago, experimenting with new photography techniques.

I spent all day yesterday reading ‘The Exorcist’, and looking ruefully at what I intend to be the first draft my next book. This book has a silent, sullen, intractable quality, the kind only books-that-are-yet-to-be-written and mouth ulcers have. Try as I might, I couldn’t will myself to continue my research or even just refine the chapter outline.

What is the nature of inspiration? How are some of us inspired to bound out of bed and write blogs and books, start new business ventures, work out and even plan events?

I realise now that inspiration doesn’t choose to randomly inhabit the persons of the chosen few whilst denying itself to others. Inspiration, instead, comes to those who are willing to create an atmosphere for it to thrive. Much like providing a safe and healthy environment for children, pets or plants to grow in, inspiration also needs a certain fecundity of environment. Innocuous social media trends, consumerist mouse clicks, ‘news’ in 280 characters or less….all these are inspiration vampires. Reading a real newspaper, or even an entire book (whole and unabridged!), a Bharatnatyam or pottery class or even going on a trip with your friends can kneed the cool balm of inspiration on our frazzled minds and insipid lives.

In speaking to many people my age, I realise that the biggest inspiration sponge is a strange, inexplicable fixation on who we think we are and what we think we like. A definition of us, if you will, and one that is cast in stone. So whether its refusal to simply experiment with a new fashion trend, a new genre or even just a different color, the quickest way to kill creativity (excuse the alliteration) is to sigh with pleasure in our comfort zones. The sigh that stifled a million brea(d)ths of experience.

So I wonder then, perhaps spending all day reading wasn’t really a waste of time? It might have instead refuelled my inspiration reserves so that I can now look at my research from a different angle, get rid of the blinkers that build up even as we’re looking at the same word, closet, living room and city for the umpteenth time.

0 Comments

Wellness

Assembling a Chair – A Yoga Blog

June 15, 2021

At the outset this blog may look like it has nothing to do with yoga, but just like my Freddy Mercury blog, this one is indeed also a yoga blog.

A Gift is Always Welcome

It’s always great to receive presents. My husband gave me a desk a couple of months ago to put at this beautiful window we have in our bedroom. As I type this out I can hear the birds chirping. At least one of the birds is a nightingale! Outside the window are trees of various kinds.

What I was missing though was a comfortable chair to go along with the desk. For months I’ve been using an Iyengar Chair, so when my friend Medha said she wanted to give me a chair I gladly accepted.

Yoga & Chair Assembly

The chair is an Astrix gaming chair and super comfortable. While my husband assembled the chair I couldn’t help but notice that humans have an unconscious tendency to sit in postures resembling yogasasanas. I was inspired now just like I was with my Freddy Mercury blog and promptly started taking photos.

This is how the chair came to us. We took an inventory of the screws and other bits that

He started with assembling the wheels:

Reminds me a bit of Baddhakonasana.

Carefully reading the manual to make sure we don’t make any mistakes:

Sort of like Janu Sirsasana.

The backrest is comfortable and sturdy.

Marichyasana.

Making sure we don’t miss a screw.

Bhardwajasana.

Putting the armrests together.

Ardhauttanasana.

Ensuring the wheels fit.

Malasana.

Always happy about building things. 🙂

Sukhasana.

What do you think? Do you also find yourself seeing what you love everywhere? Do you think that this blog is a yoga blog?

4 Comments

Wellness

What About Our Healing?

May 20, 2021

I took a class the other day for a student who zooms in from Singapore. Just as we were about to start class she got a WhatsApp message. She (uncharacteristically) excused herself and checked it. Looking up she said, “My mom’s brother just passed away.”

I’m not sure what the ‘right’ reaction to this news is given the circumstances. The night before I heard that two of my husband’s friends have lost their mothers. During dinner my in-laws told us of a family friend, a doctor, who also succumbed. The week before that I got news that a family friend whom we’ve known since our days in Bangladesh, passed away in the hospital. Friends and well-wishers tried to frantically get in touch with her son. But in these times, the tone and timbre of our grieving has also changed. We are all going through collective trauma, ironically in isolation. But what about our healing?

So I asked her if she wanted to take some time, call someone, perhaps even postpone the class. We ended up continuing with the class.

I woke up this morning feeling like I need a week off to clear my head. It’s perhaps a symptom of being under long term stress. We managed the first lock down by going online, catching up with friends over wine on zoom, baking banana bread and having it with dalgona coffee. This second wave has brought with it tragic news on a daily basis. So tragic in fact that we no longer check the news for numbers. So tragic that most of us have actively started to do whatever we can to help – donating, amplifying voices on social media, and even just staying in and balancing our chores with work.

Stress over a sustained period of time starts to change people. What we are living through is not only stress, but also trauma. No wonder many of us have started complaining about fatigue and a sense of disconnect from our surroundings. We feel like we’re on auto-mode, robotically marking the beginning and end of days; the beginning and end of weeks. Half of 2021 will be over next month, and many of us can’t tell the difference between this year and the last.

I’ve bought bed-sheets, new flip flops, changed the arrangement of my yoga room, joined a yoga sutras chanting class, even set up WhatsApp for Business and included that on my Facebook page. Only to realize that these aren’t the changes I need.

Resilience is a way of coping with trauma, and many of us continue to be brave. What about the healing from this trauma? Psychotherapist and counselor Simi Mathew says sometimes just hanging in there and going through the trauma is also a healing process. “But the actual healing,” she says, “which is about letting go and healing the actual scar, that happens when we are aware of it and we actively seek help for it.”

Perhaps even as we trudge through another meeting; as we look wistfully at the beautiful weather in Bangalore these days; as we stay up late doom-scrolling and wake up groggy; even then our healing is happening.

Scenes from our Liguria Yoga Retreat two years ago. Soon we shall all emerge from this time, ready to move, dine and practice together again.

0 Comments

Yoga

A Note of Thanks

April 29, 2021

We’re living in unprecedented times right now. None of us actually thought we would end up in a situation where the roads in our overcrowded cities would be painfully empty again. In March 2020 I looked out at the busy junction outside my apartment and tried to digest the surrealness of it all. A year later I live in an apartment that doesn’t face a loud busy road but wonderful neem and bougainvillea trees. If I crane my neck just so I get a peek at Ulsoor Road. These days I find myself craning my neck a bit too often, incredulous that today things are so much worse than a year ago.

At this moment my work gives me lots of solace, and I am grateful for that. I realize few people can claim that, and that makes me more grateful for the choices and decisions I’ve made.

My first online class during the pandemic was in March last year. It was a forty minute call because Zoom only allows forty minutes for free users. It was a mix of my private and group students. I am grateful I had an old MacBook that I could use because my Lenovo has a malfunctioning camera (I am looking to replace said Lenovo). I am grateful that my living room at the time was rectangular and clean, which made it easy to position the laptop at an optimum angle for teaching. I am grateful to those students who gave it a go. That support has kept me going financially, emotionally, intellectually and also spiritually. At a time when many yoga teachers were turning up their noses at teaching online, I was able to jump on the bandwagon fairly quickly because of the acceptance and encouragement I received. None of us knew this would become a way of life, and in retrospect most of us are thankful that we went online sooner than later.

I’m thankful also to all those teachers who collaborated with me, bridged boundaries to connect, learn and grow virtually. Our sangha or community has grown in ways we never thought possible.

We are in the middle of one of the greatest challenges we have faced as a country, and I can only hope that things get back to normal soon. But until then, we must keep doing what we can, with the song of gratitude in our hearts.

From two years ago at Rainbow falls in Nagaland. Happy, carefree and amidst nature.

0 Comments

Yoga

Word of the Year (2021)

December 22, 2020

BLAZE

Social media is constantly trying to tell us that this year has been a terrible one. This message has gotten louder specially now that the year is ending and we’re all making resolutions for the next year. However, if you listen to the softer voices, you’ll realize that there is a parallel dialogue going on; one where this year hasn’t been the worst, but actually one of the best.

I remember last year vivdly for all the travel and good work it brought me. Last year was defined by movement – to travel, to work, for leisure and for the soul. This year was a stark contrast to last year. The world was indoors, the skies cleared up, Netflix reduced it’s video resolution (for a while at least).

It was seemingly the perfect time to take up a new hobby, to read the TBR books, to clean the house and your friends’ list. It’s no surprise most of us got none of this done, this year was unforgiving with its strangeness. I thought I’d go through the pile of books accumulating on my bookshelf (and on most other surfaces in my apartment. I also thought I’d write my magnum opus. The piles continue to grow and the magnum opus is a dream.

But I’m also well rested, bubbling with ideas, still in love with yoga. I have the energy to teach 7 consecultive classes and the enthusiasm to draw rough outlines for my magnum opus. I write 3 journal pages a day and read a chapter every night before I sleep. This year has given me an important pause. Next year I’m ready to blaze on…

[You may also want to check out a similar reflections exercise I did last year.]

With gratitude…always.

2 Comments

Older Posts