A Shopaholic Mom Wonders – How Much Is Too Much?

The “Problem” of Plenty

As people who can provide for their children, we’re constantly grappling with the question: how much is too much when it comes to things? I believe that’s at the heart of conscious parenting, making intentional choices rather than giving in to excess. From the moment Kalindi was born, there’s been no dearth of clothes, toys and general stuff. I remember thinking, we had enough things to last until she started school. A year and a half later, I know that to be true.

A friend of mine used to lament that her family was plagued by ‘the problem of plenty’. Every time I heard her say that, something inside me would instinctively recoil. I wondered how she could complain about having too much in a world where people struggled for the basics. I’d flinch every time I heard, hoping one day she would see the light and find a solution for her so-called ‘problem’.

The Simplicity of Hand-Me-Downs

Many women have asked me why I dress my baby in hand me downs. Some wonder why I don’t want my style reflected in the clothes I choose to dress my baby in. Add to that the color coordinated, clean, funny and well behaved kids on social media (replete with hair in pretty bows and and not a block out of place in their toy rooms) …

But this blog isn’t about how I deal with the pressure of social media, or how I deal with societal pressure about what kind of mom I should be (because I think I’m at a juncture where I’m slowly becoming immune and indifferent to social media). This blog is about how I curb my tendencies to shop and fill my wardrobe mindlessly, so that I can set a better example for my daughter. Being mindful is something I value and want to share with her. And there is nowhere better I can model this for her than when we are on vacation, where I often keep a day reserved to explore the local markets.

Waste not want not.

Mindful Shopping in Sri Lanka 

While pushing the stroller in the precincts of the Galle Fort during our recent trip to Sri Lanka, we came across Barefoot Ceylon, a store specialising in local arts, supporting local artisans. I had come across this store during my first trip to Sri Lanka too, but had put it on my list of ‘Things To Do Next Time’. This time I went in and loved the handmade clothes, the colors, the textures…and told myself that I should look for something meaningful, more unique.

Which is when I decided to take a look at the books and the toys. Could I perhaps find a book that would delight my daughter and have a longlasting effect on her? Maybe a beautiful toy that would remain a treasure long after the trip was over.

So we decided to get a handmade iguana and a llama. Toys that looked interesting, spoke of the local culture and were fun.

Yoga, Parenting, and Conscious Choices

There’s a concept in yoga called aparigraha — non-hoarding or non-possessiveness. Often people think that as yogis we should be practicing non attachment and deny ourselves material goods. But aparigraha is about living with what you need – not denial and not excess. Choosing these simple toys was a practice in aparigraha. We didn’t need more toys, but we certainly wanted to bring back somethign special for Kalindi from Sri Lanka. It was her birthday trip after all.. But we chose a few meaningful ones that align with our values.

Then there’s ahimsa, the principle of non-violence. Opting for handmade, natural materials over mass-produced plastic is not just a parenting decision, it’s an extension of a yogic life. These choices support the environment, local economies, and avoid unnecessary harm.

Watching my daughter delight in these toys also reminded me of santosha — contentment. Children don’t need flashing lights and overstimulation. They need presence, space, and a chance to use their imagination. These humble toys gave her exactly that.

 

Conscious Parenting On and Off the Mat

I often think parenting is the greatest lesson in being present, being mindful and growth. Whether we’re traveling or at home – I’m constantly wondering what Kalindi is learning from and about me. Do I want her to choose convenience over her carbon footprint and order takeout and more things than she needs from Amazon/Myntra. I’m learning that parenting isn’t about being perfect or doing things a certain way. It’s about making choices that reflect our inner values. Whether on the mat, in parenting, or while wandering the world, may we keep making intentional choices.

If this resonated with you, I share more thoughts on yoga, mindful living, and motherhood on my blog. You can also join me on Instagram where I share more from our journey.