My First Weekend Alone With Kalindi

My first weekend alone with Kalindi was only recently, when she was a year and eight months old.

As a parent living in India, I’m so blessed to be able to afford lots and lots of help. We’ve had help with Kalindi from day 1, and I feel like I’m a more peaceful and relaxed mother because of that. I’ve had enough time to heal, have been able to balance my life with motherhood and have assimilated a lot of tidbits about child rearing, culture and even boundaries.

My first weekend  away from her involved endless planning of nanny timings and friends helping out. I didn’t speak with Kalindi for three days because I didn’t want anything to make her realise I’m not home.

So for the first weekend when Animesh was going to be away, I decided I’d take it easy and focus on spending time having fun with Kalindi.

At the same time, it was approaching the year end and there were many loose ends I wanted to tie up. I’d have to figure out how to balance

Day 1: The First Night

Animesh left in the morning. I had the nanny for the full day and decided to get ahead on some teaching, writing and book club reading.

After the nanny left I decided to switch everything off and read a little with Kalindi. She’s been a bit under the weather and  Kalindi had been a bit under the weather and I was dreading giving her the dose of medicine. She also gets a bit cranky and putting her to sleep can be quite a chore.

I told myself to be in the moment with her, to truly connect with her. She might have sensed my ease because giving her the medicine wasn’t too difficult. I also thought it would be nice to spend time with her relaxing before sleep, without worrying about bedtime. Spending time with your child is basically about falling in love with them all over again. I love the way Kalindi loves music and tells me what she wants to listen to, I love the way she reaches for me when she gets sleepy or just hasn’t seen me for a while, I love the way she’s started having dancing parties with her toys. I keep telling her I love her, and today, to my utter surprise and delight she replied clearly, “I love you too.” This was the highlight of the weekend, and possibly of my life.

She eventually drifted off to sleep, one hand snug inside mine.

Once she was asleep, I caught up on a Vedanta lecture I’d missed earlier in the week. Later, I poured myself a whisky, did some online shopping (the sales are so good right now), and made plans to start studying the Yoga Sūtras through an online course I’ve subscribed to.

I’d say it was a calm night.

Day 2: An Afternoon of Nothing

I had the nanny for the full day on Day 2 too.

So I decided to step out with Medha, to celebrate her acquisition of a beautiful car! We’re both trying to breathe a little easier before the year ends. That creates space to reflect and plan, essential end-of-year activities.

We drove to Filter Café Kitchen on Mysore Road, taking a few detours along the way to admire the beautiful countryside. We drove through open fields, quiet roads, lots of livestock. The place was decked up for Christmas and New Years and it was great to talk

The food was good, but more than that, it was great to talk about life, books, travel – stuff we usually don’t get time to talk about.  We’re usually talking about workshops.

On the drive back, I finished Mistletoe by Alice Littlewood. I’m reading as much as I can before the year ends, hoping to reach my Goodreads target.

For the second night I had asked a friend to be on standby, but after managing the previous night, I felt I didn’t need her.

Day 3: Playdates and Timing

The day began with a playdate. We went over to one of my friend’s houses. I met Tanuja when I was pregnant. She is a friend of a friend and generously offered me hand me downs for my new baby. In fact, she even gave me a crib!

Kalindi had a great time, she made friends with the cats, devoured strawberries and Tanuja’s homemade dip.

A friend of mine had invited me to a concert the same night. I arranged for the nanny to babysit Kalindi until I got home.

A Simple Weekend

I wish I could say that the weekend gave me some dramatic or transformative lessons. I often think Kalindi is growing up really fast, and I feel weekends like these give me time to savor moments with her. I think children can feel it too – there’s a renewed

Although, I can say that I’m now more confident of taking care of Kalindi on my own, but I do think situations like these help you flex that muscle.